Ten tips for assisting parents in getting their children ready for the first school term of 2013

The last days of the school holidays are upon us, and the new school year is right around the corner.  Whether you can’t wait till your kids are back in school or dread the more regimented days ahead, there’s one thing you can count on:  Back to School is always a big transition. 

Kids who are starting school for the first time or moving to a new school have the biggest adjustment, but even moving up a grade means coping with a new teacher, more academic demands and a changing social circle.   

Start preparing now to make those first weeks easier for your kids – and yourself!  Here’s how:

1. Facilitate your child’s bonding with the teacher.  All kids need to feel connected to their teacher to feel comfortable in the classroom.   Until they do, they are not ready to learn.  Experienced teachers know this, and “collect” their students emotionally at the start of the school year. 

2. Facilitate bonding with the other kids. Kids are always nervous about their new teacher, but if they know any of the other kids, they’ll feel more at ease. If you can arrange for your son or daughter to travel to school that first morning with a child he or she knows, even if they aren’t in the same classroom, it will ease last minute jitters.

3. Saying goodbye. If your child is beginning school for the first time and has not had previous daycare or preschool experience, his or her biggest challenge will be saying goodbye to you.  Explain that all children go to school to learn, which is a child’s job just like parents work at jobs. 

4. Start conversations about the next grade at school or about beginning school.  One good way to do this is to select books relating to that grade.  Your librarian can be helpful; some good choices include books by Alan & Janet Ahlberg, Stan & Jan Berenstain, Dianne Blomberg, Marc Brown, Lauren Child, Julie Danneberg, Bonnie Graves, James Howe, Beth Norling, Marisabina Russo, and Amy Schwartz.

Get your kids excited by talking about what they can expect, including snack, playground, reading, computers, etc.  If you know other children who will be in his class or in the school, be sure to mention that he will see or play with them.  Share your own stories about things you loved about school.

5. If a younger sibling will be at home with you, be sure your child knows how boring it will be at home and how jealous you and the younger sibling are that you don’t get to go to school like a big kid. 

6. Get your kids back on an early to bed schedule well before school starts.  Most kids begin staying up late in the summer months.  But kids need 9 1/2 to 11 hours of sleep a night, depending on their age.  (Teens need a minimum of 9.5; toddlers usually do best with 11). Getting them back on schedule so they’re sound asleep by 9pm to be up at 7am for school takes a couple of weeks of gradually moving the bedtime earlier. So keep an eye on the calendar and start moving bedtime a bit earlier every night by having kids read in bed for an hour before lights out, which is also good for their reading skills.

7. Wake up your child’s brain.  You aren’t the teacher, and you don’t need to start school before the school year starts by pulling out the flashcards or assigning math problems.  On the other hand, research shows that kids forget a lot during the summer.  If your child has been reading through the summer months, congratulations!  If not, this is the time to start.  Visit the library and let him pick some books he’ll enjoy.  Introduce the idea that for the rest of the summer everyone in the family (you can include yourself if you like, or you can read to them) will read for an hour every day. 

8. The day before school starts, talk about exactly what will happen the next day to give your child a comfortable mental movie. Be alert for signs that your child is worried, and reflect that most kids are a little nervous before the first day of school, but that he will feel right at home in his new classroom soon.

9. Get yourself to bed early the night before school so you can get up early enough to deal calmly with any last minute crises.  Be sure kids – including teens! – lay out clothes the night before, that lunches are made, and that everyone gets enough sleep and a healthy breakfast.  Plan to arrive at school early so you have time for meaningful goodbyes.  And don’t forget that “first day of school” photo before you leave home!

10. If your child gets teary when you say goodbye, reassure her that she will be fine and that you can’t wait to see her at the end of the day.  Don’t leave her adrift without a new attachment person, but once you’ve put her in good hands, don’t worry.  Experienced teachers know about first day jitters and are used to bonding with their charges. Her tears won’t last long.  If your child continues to have a hard time separating, be sure to speak with the teacher.  Maybe she can give her a special job every morning, or facilitate a friendship with another child who has similar interests.

 
By: Dr. Laura Markham